ROOTS AND WINGS

A friend asked me to post a poem I wrote this past year based on my teenage son. Being a single Mom has come with such a special mix of both joys and challenges. But no one could prepare me for parenting a teen. But I have to say, through God's grace, I'm grateful to friends who support me, a God who loves me and two young men that I am am so privileged to have as sons. The truth is, I've grown as much as they have. What a blessing every stage has been!

I PROMISED I WOULD GIVE YOU WINGS by Jerry Lyn Luckie

I remember rocking you during those early morning feedings
Singing softly to you and promising two things:
I would give you roots—a foundation, a hope
And I would give you wings—to let you fly free
…to be who you were created to be.

The years have a way of rushing past and here we are
Living through divorce, and pain that you describe as the “hole in your heart”,
but amidst that struggle--to experience extraordinary joy and laughter
and perspective that has defined us
Learning together about growing up,
about what matters most
Learning how to be there
Living out a life of love.

I look at you now straining my head to look up into your eyes
Your face contorted with this “Oh, I am so right” determination
So willing to take on any political view just for the debate of it
Willing to stand up and do what is right, just as I hoped
(Though maybe with a little less of an attitude)

I sometimes think, “Where have you gone my precious boy?”
But I know you are in there, though sometimes I have to dig deep
Until I find the little boy smile or the eyes that light your face

Finding those faults in me that I thought were hidden from view
Examining my values, my choices, my life under a microscope
Pushing and pulling, struggling and negotiating, loving and doubting

Yet I know we are just where we are supposed to be in this moment
You wanting to push and test and see if I really do believe and trust in you
Me spending sleepless nights wondering if I’ve done the right thing
Picked the right battle, let your character shine through enough

And I wonder now: Have I done enough? Do the roots go deep enough?
Yet I know I have done my best in our circumstance to build the foundation
It’s really the wing part I have the hardest time with.
And yet, promises are met to be kept.

We have each held on tightly and now we know the time comes
For the releasing of hands, of hearts, of lives
For you have been molded into the individual you are becoming:
establishing even now, YOUR values, YOUR faith, YOUR choices, YOUR life

Because this is life as it should be
And I promised I would give you your wings.